“Back in 1997, I wrote an article for my consulting colleagues about blockers to listening. As I’m a hoarder, I still have them so here they are:
baggage - extraneous clutter in our own brains which distracts from the conversation in hand
inner noise - the conversation sets off a train of thoughts which, though fascinating, prevent us from continuing to listen
control - leaps of understanding about what the person is trying to say, missing his/her actual point entirely
ping-pong - where a client’s point triggers a memory or an opinion, so we spend the next minutes looking for a suitable gap to express it
display - where we use the conversation as a tool to express our own knowledge, ignoring the client’s subject matter and making him feel stupid in the bargain
hidden agenda - where we ensure that the conversation achieves our own goals, forgetting to check that the client’s goals are satisfied.
We’ve all done them, me more than most probably. But over the past twenty years, I have at least learned that often, saying nothing is the best form of communication. “
Original source: Poor listening